Anna Walker

Anna worked for Calendar as sports correspondent for a number of years before moving to BSB, then Sky Sports. She has since sunk without trace. Her too wide mouth and devil eyes make her ideal for kiddies parties.

Sean Bean

Actor, responsible for Lady Chatterlys Lover, Sharpe and Bravo-two-zero. Manages to be reasonably successful despite having appaling acting ability and dodgiest accents ever. Even his "real" yorkshire accent sounds made it.

Famous for having 100% GIT tattoo'd on his forehead.

The face of Sean Bean >>

Richard Carborn MP

Risen to the heady hights of Uk Sports Minister depite his love of the Piggies and not knowing anything about sport (see here). Member of Parliament for Sheffield Central, he has served on Sheffield Counci for a number of years. Claims he had nothing to do with the World Student Games debacle, and that he knew nothing about dodgy SUFC director Mike Macdonald.

bbc news report >>

Paul Heaton

Chief of terminal cock-pop-band "Beautiful South" Heaton is able to churn out lyrical effluent at a rate of knots. Promoter of football violence, but decidedly quiet about his support of United he has singlularly failed to put any of his aquired millions into the Pigs.

Def Leppard

Despite the tragedy that has befallen this group throughout their career (deaths, car crashes, missing arms) the 'Def still manage to turn out the bubble perm cock rock, that made them famous in the mid '80s, for consumption by